Can I handle the worst case?
I have a fairly steep fear of reaching out to connect with people for the first time.
What if I get rejected — directly or indirectly?
What if they don’t like me?
These concerns are potent and, in many cases, have successfully talked me out of reaching out to the people I want to reach out to.
However, the dilemma remains that if I don’t learn how to reach out to others or engage with discomfort directly then I will be limiting my growth and my ability to become the kind of person I want to be.
So here’s how I talk myself back in:
- Ask “what’s the worst case scenario?” Maybe I do get rejected directly; maybe they don’t like me.
- Ask “can I handle this scenario?” It’s a big world. Not everyone gets along and that’s okay. We move on. Surfacing these observations is helpful.
If I can accurately describe #1 and find a way to arrive at a “yes” for #2, then more often than not I’m out of the rut.
We can always punt facing our fears into the future but it remains the case that the only way to overcome them is to look at them directly and decide how we will overcome them.
