The cost of not

Overcoming fears is hard because it requires you to do something that is unfamiliar and uncomfortable.

We creatures of habit generally do not like this combination.

It’s only after you’ve done the thing you’re afraid of — speaking in front of an audience, asking for a raise, biking without training wheels — that you have a chance to reflect on the experience and realize that a) it’s not so bad and b) you’ve grown.

A tactic that’s helped me overcome longstanding fears is contemplating the cost of not facing them.

LinkedIn can be a great place to make connections with like-minded and helpful people, yet it scared me for the longest time to make connections. The biggest driver of this fear was the feeling of rejection.

But then I contemplated the costs of not reaching out and it boils down to this:

You will never know what was possible.

If you reach out to somebody and you don’t hear back, it may not feel great at first. But it’s likely nothing personal; people are busy.

But what if you do hear back and you end up making a great connection as a result?

And let’s also not forget the personal growth that occurs the moment you face the fear.

These are the costs of opting out of momentary discomfort.

The realization that the cost of avoiding something far outweighs the cost of facing it is an important moment to seek — it can put things into sufficient perspective to push you into action.